Last Minute Plan

i hate last minute plan
i really hate it
even tho i didn't need much time in getting prepared
i still cannot stand if someone told me last minute

i try to be punctual as i can
i'm not saying i am perfect
just i TRY to be punctual
i dont mind waiting for people
just i dont like people waiting for me
that's all..

even my friends know im a control freak
i mean i need to know the time to go
for me to get ready for it

but when i goes out of my controls
i will be very furious and frustrated
and i just hate myself even more
because i let that thing happened

Wrong Moved

i hate it when i make a mistake
i hate it when i hear other people advice
not that i don't want to take those advice
but i hate experiance the pain in the heart
seriously i'm sucks at it
i don't know to tackle the moments
for me families are everything to me
eventho i have a love hate relationship with my dad =)
but yes, family are important to me
i never abandon them even sometime they drive me crazy

but yes! i couldn't stand the treatment
i'm in control in my life not you
dont make me feel miserable about it
don't make me hate of it even more
please

Unspoken Action

i think i'm just a simple person
a small gesture could make me so HAPPY
i don't demand too much (or i think i don't..haha)
just what is your unforgettable unspoken action !

for me.hangout with my family + friends are the most precious moments
the time that we watched movie or even eating our meals
the moment u just sit next to each other
the present of others, brings comfort to me =)

i could sleep by my friend, without speaking to them
the way they celebrates your day with joyfulness & laughter
i will always miss those moments (they make you feel special)
most of the time they will be there standing next to you
you always know that you have a shoulder to cry onto

but the moment i appreciate most (maybe i wanting all along)
is the time i had the opportunity to see the skies at night
i really adore that moment (i wish i could go back again)
and i never had that-kind-of-conversation-before
with the peaceful-background sounds, it's really relaxing
hope to get that kind of feel again. really fall in love at that time

now i'm in my dreams once more,
i guess is better for me to get some sleep
(hope it appears in my dreams tonight)

goodnight people! love you!

So Long & Goodbye Robin

**i know it is kind of weird hearing this from me**

my aunt's cat has passed away yesterday
it is quite sad to hear that
among all she is the most loyal one
i really love her the most (i had to admit)
i never really like cats but somehow i have soft-spot for them
hope alex & casey is ok (healthy i mean)
maybe i will drop by to seremban

p/s: later i will her put her pic

Settle Down

hey! i'm not settling down NOW!
just maybe in few years time
but who knows kalau esok ada orang masuk meminang ke

congratulations to my friend Najia
who is going to be engaged with her beloved one next saturday
yeah i heard a few of my friends is going to be in the list this year
sometimes i keep wondering until when i want to be like this
just thinking and be happy to others make me thinking about my life
yes last time i said i might be settling down around 28+-
but now, thinking back..i just let time to decide itself

ok the fact is i'm happy because all my friends are happy right now
me? i with i-make-all-the-problems-in-my-head (tengah serabut nih)
anyway. see u later people.

hoping to see familiar faces this coming weekend.
hope boleh mengubat luka dan rindu di hati ini.

p/s: now kalau nk contact saya, please use the old method SMS. jarang beronline dah. ofis xde tenet. but sometime i hi-jack other people's laptop (like now).haha

One Little Bird Has Told Me ...

"if you gain something, you might loose something along the way"

i want to be selfish!enough said.
i want to gain more but not losing anything
could i manage to pull through?
i hope so...

I Think I'm Losing ...

yeah i know i'm a bit emotional this week
but i need to learn how to handle it later
why later? cause now i just couldn't help to get a bit upset every time it slip my mind
i don't want to be selfish but somehow i know i am
that's why i need to learn to control it
just give some time for me to get over it
which i don't think i might but i have too
no matter what happen

but lucky i have "her"
thanks! i dont think i could make it yesterday
thanks dengar i mengomel2 in the phone
i know u dont know how to calm me down in that situation
but appreciate when u spent time with me
i really do.

now i have to think how to overcome this feelings
think hazirah think.

Go To HELL With Work

yeah go to hell
i extremely fedup with this
abusing me every single day
weekdays, work until late hours
weekends, until late hours also
if i'm home, people hauted me with phone calls

new resolution starting next week.
reject unwanted phone calls.
easy, just switch off/silent the phone
HAPPY! yes, i'm happy
i'm staying in KL
for god sake i'm in seremban
a dead city with no one i know
only weekends is my only hope
seyesly, i can go crazy with this

soon i need a doctor to check my mental
i guess my brain doesn't function well
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
GO TO HELL WITH WORK!!!!

No Worries

i guess last night i was in a huge emotions
for lack of reasons, i bust out loud how i felt
thanks for being concern
i think i will be all right

i just need to step up with these games
(auditing and human behaviour)
i never thought that working in small environment
can brutally abused your mental
i guess i'm not quite prepare for that

but i guess i will have a fall back plan
those plans includes holiday trip, meeting friends
and also pampering myself
i guess having a cossy dinner by myself sound great now
i have to do what i have to do right now

living in boarding school doesn't help much in this life process
being around people 24/7 do make me comfortable with people
living alone it just makes me feel lonely but i have to coop with it
right now, i MUST make myself comfortable with my own self
now is the-me-time, i have to try my best

yeah strive for the best
u need to make yourself happier each day
i guess i'm ON with the friends-searching-online
sounds pathetic, not as pathetic as my life now
HAHA

Am I Living That Far?

that is the question.i just found out some info regarding on my friends

a. one of them have a new car (for several weeks already)

b. one of them is single (i dont know for how long already)

c. one of them is getting a car (i know about this a few weeks ago)

d. one of them is getting married (i heard sometimes ago)

e. one of them is going holiday trips.

f. one of them is finishing is her degree just a few weeks more

g. one of them is in taiping right now.

i think my list could be longer if i know each and everyone updates. i guess i'm the one who is not updated with the "real" world. i the person who is not connected with everyone. but i guess living in seremban make me feels far from everyone. i've used to talk to them or see them everyday. i guess i'm in my OWN world now.

my life is not as important, fun as before. everything is related to work. i could feel the joyness or freedom anymore. and it just wouldn't feel right. the one thing i love the most is watching movies. but now, all i could say that every movie in my list, i hardly see it or just no time for me to enjoy myself.

i which to have that life of mine again.but i know life is always forward not backwards. i have to deal with this life the soonest. not to worry everyone. everything is under control. (i hope so)

Can Best Friend be Your Life Partner?

**note:it will be a long post and just a thought to myself**

someone asked me about this recently
and this morning i heard about it
at hot fm "AM Krew"
what do you think about it?

for me if you could find bestfriend and life partner in one person
you are lucky because it hard to find one
but for me it just hard to find someone like that
maybe i had a bad experiance with it
bestfriend should stay as bestfriend only
but if later years i end up with my bestfriend
i guess i'm wrong either way
but for now i think bestfriend should remains as bestfriend

it started after i finished school
i'm closed with Z
i felt comfortable talking to him
it just felt that i found someone in common
we play miskol every 3 seconds
it is interesting to have a conversation every 3secs
and we talk stuffs; comics,rugby,girls,boys,etc etc
and one day it just end up somewhere

after a few months
something happened
i receive calls from his secret admirer
then he lost his phone
and then the major point of it
he break with me during my examination weeks
and a few days from my birthday
man, it is a big hit for me
but lucky my grades is not that bad

after breaking off with me thru friendster
3 months later, he come back as a "bestfriend" to me
he acts normally and forgetting the past
i guess i just need to forget it
but what he did is mean
and yeah after he dumps me
he come back to me to ask for my help
what is the favor he ask?
he ask me to help him to tackle a girl
how could that be?
and yeah, to prove that i'm over him
i help him in every way

i guess that we are mean to be bestfriend
but how he ended the r/ship
it just unbelieveable
to be honest,right now
me and him are not friends no more
it just end like that
ackward to meet or have conversation with him
i know i lost a bestfriend but what end just end

now i'm happy with someone else
just to say that bestfriend is not a good candidate to be life partner
your either married them or break the friendship
eventho the friendship is not end
but relationship is not the same as before

but i do have friends which endup with their bestfriends
and they are happily together
they have advantages in knowing each others
but anyhow, who ever we end up with aka married
it is your choice and be happy with it

The Shock of My Life Today

yeah as the title says
i had my life time shock (just 1 of it la)
my old friend(since mrsm) told me some news
which i hardly believe it because of the time period
man, she should told me earlier

i always think i would experience this feeling
during the month of march
but i think too soon
i got the shock of my life sooner
i'm overwhelm with the news and wishing lucks
i'm happy with the news and yet shock

what the news is about?
the next post(i guess next week i'll post about it)
i will tell u guys about it
i could help myself in sharing this news to some other of my friends

I AM HAPPY! I AM SHOCK!
I HAD A WONDERFUL FRIENDS!

What did i missed?

1. i miss doing laundry with my rumet. met u igt x(zaman blom jadi rumet),we did our laundry at old v5 and had ice cream while waiting for it.then lepak2 kat tepi tasik buatan manusia.

2. makan nasi lemak kak shida rmai2 dlm bilik twin/zac. gelak2 sepuluh orang dalam black-out.

3. lepak kat "bilik rasmi" aka tv room malam2 watching "queer eye for a straight guy" or anything that the tv showed.

4. tgk ju-on. priceless! rmai2 jerit2 and ade org tuh takut tdo kat katil die cz dekat ngan siling.hehehe.

5. usha2 orang kate cafe ngan ned.

6. ade this sem, me and others suke usha orang kapel. slalu buat dialog sendiri. ade one time, the gf tuh xmo makan,and the me with them (mereka2 tuhla),buat dialog.
"u la, i xmo makan kat v3, i nk mkn kat v4".zac kamu igt x nih.

7. oh. adegan pitam dalam toilet. zac & aliah g klinik ambek ubat. ned teman cz me nk muntah. raje dtg lari2 anak, tanye kat me what is my IC num. and surprisingly i boleh igt in that desperate time.

8. the birthday surprises. tepung&telur, air sabun, air yg dicampur2 ngan apetah. birthday cake and soft toy (penguin).

9. 1st time turun ipoh ngan kete kancil zac. g beli bali nyer cake kat secret recipe ipoh. on the way, beli buah bali as birthday present.

10. the karaoke sessions(many things happened).the joget2 lagu rossa and latest(discovered mase grad)mulan jamilah.

11. sambut birthday lin&ieyza kat teluk batik.then g mkn2 kat kdai mkn kt lumut. ikan 3 rase yg sedap.

12. ponteng klaz math sebab nk tgk final malaysia idol (jac menang).

13. maen basketball malam and cam-whore with raje+zac+ain.

14. maen squash like a crazy person with raje. pukul merata2.hahaahahah.

15. movie-marathon with them. non-stop.paling banyak dlm record 4 kot.

16. downloading movies+series. makan lunch+dinner while watching CSI.interesting.

17. watch akedemi fantasia with them. jalan dr v2 ke old v5.sanggup.

18. BBQ sessions & raya celebrations with the mekarians.

19. last sem, maen bowling(almost every week, mase last) and thanks to kapes ajar maen kad.haha tok guru yg penyabar. itu pon provoke mase diorg maen.hahaha.

20. sesi photography yg menarik with rakan2.

21. mase intern,g tdo dalam sleeping room. istenk standby utk report kalu ade org cari. and every event ade makan2. me+zac+raje+mizah tanpa segan silu makan (siap tapau lagik) =D

22. sesi kedai mamak kat dapur sendiri. rmai org tanye how can i talk to the same people 24/7 everyday. yela, mereka ialah kosmet saye, mereka ialah hosmet saye and mereka ialah kawan saye. kami borak berjam2 di dapur sendiri sambil makan2. roti bakar pon jadi. xde roti? minum air pon jalan.kehkehkeh.

23. sesi tangkap gmbr with mizah kat library. mizah i am okay right as a tour guide.penat melayan kamu mase tuh but i really had fun. banyak btol gambar w/pon xsampai 2 jam pusing2 kat academic block.hahah.

24. 1st time drive manual after dpt lesen. hantar ain g medan gopeng (kul 6.30pm). then balik with raje(together).depan KFC xreti nk reverse kete. and bangga kete xmati enjin until....mati enjin depan pakgad.hahahah.

25. during convofair, lepak kat ayamas lame gler. borak2 bende yg same.man i could get bored with my friends. pas ayamas stall sambung kat cafe or kat dapur. hehehe.

26. tgk citer shutter at zac's room. the ten of us and we scream like nobody business.the funny thing is that we need to replay some part of the movie because ieyza covered raje face with a pillow. and yet we scream again eventho we know what will happened.

27. my f1st time to alamanda from SITI took me and raje nearly 50 mins which later we found out it only takes less than 15 mins. we stick to our principle "straight is better than turning". the signboard in putrajaya, didnt do much help.

and the list go on and on and on. actually banyak lagik but xigt ler. but i know those memories are stuck in my mind for ever.hehehe.

(will update the list, if somethings trigger from my memory/with the help of them)

What A Discovery

last night
while i'm surfing the net
my aunt asked me how Facebook looked like
i showed her my FB but she wants to see one of my friend's profile instead
i opened my friends list and choose the first person on the top list
then she said, why i choose him.
i said cz he's the 1st in list
and she is just wanting to see the FB layout only
then she said she wants to choose herself
i let her do it

she felt happy because she got the power to choose herself
and considering my friends list, she scrol up and down
looking who are my friends
(i never let her navigate my profile before,
she is just too nosy sometimes..haha.)
then suddently she stop.
then she choose someone.
OMG i never thought that she will choose that profile because there are alot of others to look at.
hurm she said maybe that person is related to her somehow considering the name
and she said that he look like my cousin(mukhlis).hahaha.
she looked at the pictures and said she choose someone interesting
why interesting?bcz he is in a band and plays drum.haih
then she look at ALL the pics and asked does he knows me
or i just add him for no reason.
i said "hello,i know him la.he's my batch"
hopeless, but yet happy in the same time.

then on 1 pic, she said she know one of the guy in that pic.
someone nephew or a friend's son.
and she asked whether he is from penang.
i could not answer cz i dont know where is he from.
i just know that he played guitar and one of my friend used to have a crush on him.

at the end.
my aunt got tired with it and go down.
i surf for sometime, and go to sleep.
before sleeping, borak ngan ain xingat dunia.
anyway that is just an update from me.
just a lousy+hopeless update from myself.
haha.

One Bad Day

i nearly late to office today
READ: NEARLY!!
i had to punch card at 8.30am or before that
then suddently, she wants to change her clothes.
like wth?
i'm late and she needs to change.
than, her car ran out of petrol
quick pit-stop at the oil station
not that quick either
she put full-tank and it is a mercedes
haih (my heart start beating faster already)

i had to run, like it is the end of my life
lucky me(that's the only luck today),
i managed to arrive excatly at 8.30am
no RED or penalty for today

than, my computer hang and slow
i'm not in the mood to have these slwoness in life just yet
then i read someone status
that status totally break-my-heart
ain knows it all, really heart-breaking

than the work flow never stop
it is early of the month
so the accounts need to close
during lunch, i've been left alone
than i felt on my ass and wet myself
half of my body are soaked with dirty water
and my hp somehow a bit damaged
the speaker is somehow broken somewhere(enough said)

than after lunch, my acc system give me problems
i don't know how, but my comp date is in year 2036
something went wrong somewhere
i had a breakdown for 30minutes
than helps from the HQ

than i could see the lights
cz the person who break my heart talk to me
i though they are ignoring me,
but maybe i just thinking everything negatively from start
thanks for reminding me that i need to think positive
and thanks for not laughing out loud with my incidents

i guess i could see a brighter light from the next path
everything is becoming much more better than just now
i hope that this light with enlighten me till the end
but people hoping but sometimes faith do happen to people
look at the country who have break from tradition
now people have change and their believe might change also


edit: i talk to soon. i guess i'm just in a bad luck mood/bad mood.what ever you guys. you can just discussed it and tell me the end results.i might follow the decision.(later i will cool down, but right now, forget it)

Flattered

i been wanting to post this whole week
but now i could find time to spare
this week i felt that my friends do think of me

thanks zac because hoping I was in Kuantan
even because u wanting me to accompany you to watch "Kami"
heheh i guess being a movie lover gives me some advantage

and i never thought that i will have a conversation with a person that i'm not close during the period when i'm in UTP
had a decent chat with her
we talk about our life now and some future plan
i guess time and distance do change people perspective
well it sure change mine perspective
we never had anything in common
but some of my friends thinks that we have the same personality
just how we reflect it towards others is different
how true is that i dont know.
but i hope that we still remains friend
no matter how she/he is, i still consider them a part of my life

p/s: by the way, why do you want to go to Farhana's hse? she much prefer if u invite her for lunch at some shopping complex and accompany her shopping than. hahaha knowing her for the past few years, she never did an open hse. nk g raya, boleh je kot but kene kol dulu le cz she is such a busy person (uweeekk xbusy mane pon..haha)

What Makes the Twin So Sad

this morning i received a message from Aliah
from her message, i know she is so sad
i fell bad because i cannot be there with her

both of them lost their cat
they keep the cat alive for more than 1 week
i'm proud of them because i'm not that kind
kind to animals that is
but they love cats so much
i know they dedicate their time to take care of the injured kitten
fed her, make her go to sleep, wash her mess
by the way they named the kitten, Kiki
but i called her "Alien-na" cos she looks like an alien
by the way here's the pic:

Rest in Peace -Kiki-

Little Thoughts

i'm going to post this when i left UTP
but somehow i forgot about it
here goes...

"living as a student is fun but yet challenging when it comes to do assignments and projects and exams.

but what will you miss the most from your students life are your friends (people who cheer you up every single seconds) and the things that you do together just to get through the day.

i thought the feelings will not be hard because everyone is looking forward to proceed in life but for me, 7 years living with friends makes me cherish friendship more.

how my life would be without them in the future? i always have someone to look after me and support me. even though we do have our bad moments together, but the good old days will be remembered more. i will miss you all :( "

Farewell

this afternoon i'm going back
i hope everything going fine till convo
it has been a 4 1/2 years journey
a journey that i never forget
many people i met through the process

i had enjoy it more that you know
laughter,sadness,crazy outings, etc etc
i want to apologize for all the mistakes i make.
if i ever offended others, do forgive me.
if i forgot to pay any debts, do tell me.

/* just my thoughts on how life as a students

living as a student is fun but yet challenging when it comes to do assignments and projects and exams. but what will you miss the most from your students life are you friends (people who cheer you up every single seconds) and the things that you do together just to get through the day. i thought the feelings will not be hard because everyone is looking forward to proceed in life but for me, 7 years living with friends makes me cherish friendship more.

how my life would be without them in the future?
i always have someone to look after me and support me.
even though we do have our bad moments together, but the good old days will be remembered more.

i will miss you all :(
*/

hope our path do cross in the future.

...

i'm not in the mood
i just hate you